This title was originally going to be: How to get Jen up in the morning…

But then like a DUMBASS I clicked over to the NPR website to find the story and THIS PICTURE WAS ON THE FRONT PAGE.
Which is when I started shouting.

OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD louder than I should and uncontrollably…and no, not for any GOOD reason.

Now poor Mark is awake too…

AAAAAAAACK! (This is going to be difficult to link, I seriously can’t look at the picture at all…)

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.


My earlier point that seems to be lost is…um, the words “reshape cornea” seems to wake me up faster than the words FIRE! FIRE!

And now I’m scared with that DAMN IMAGE!!! Please tell me who wants to have this done voluntarily. LOOK AT THE PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whatcha talkin' bout Willis?