My dreams are haunting me. Perhaps they are sick induced dreams since I’ve been under the weather the last few days and in bed sleeping more than usual.

Dreams about Gma Baker.

Dreams about Mark.

Bah to you dreams of sadness! Where are you coming from? Go away.

Gosh I miss her.

Darn, I think I know where they are coming from. Ash Wednesday Church.

The last time Mark and I spent time together as a couple was visiting my Gma Baker in the Nursing Home. We broke up later that night. Last time I saw Mark was at Gma’s funeral last December.

I went to church for the first time…since…since…sigh…for Ash Wednesday. I’m sick of my last time in a church being for a wedding or a funeral. When did I become that person?

My co-worker friend Bobby and I were out and about on Mardi Gras and realized we both frequent (well at one point in life, occasionally attended) the Cathedral downtown. After a drink or two we decided we would go on our lunch break the next day. And we did. And it was good. And as usual, I was missing my Grandmas and thinking about how I really enjoy going to church and hope to find someone, someday to share this with me.

Sigh.