I remember starting college and realizing that I was quickly surrounded by friends who had not yet had *the sex* not to mention many of my good friends from High School. Not all of us lasted all the way through college, like good ‘ol me though. Ah, the one, looking for the one and wanting to wait for marriage. Of course not finding the one in college helped maintain this status. And fear of ruining good friendships by crossing that line…

Alright, perhaps I wasn’t the coolest kid on the block, I wasn’t a head cheerleader nor 102 pounds soaking wet but I’ve never been in want of friendships. And I always was 100% comfortable with being a virgin, it was a non-issue. (Except for “crazy summer” after Sophomore year of college where the older boys I hung out with were in disbelief. My status was much more intriguing to them than my quirky personally, DD’s, conversation skills and the ability to drink two 40’s in a night and still get up to do the morning shift at McD’s, well, most of the time get up.)

My point, if I had one, was that I was comfortable being me. At least regarding my sexuality. And that comes from years of successful parenting. (Ok, and total fear that as soon as I had sex I would get pregnant. Thanks to Mom for instilling this fear without even realizing it! My mother had many, many miscarriages and even a pregnancy after getting a tubal ligation, I think my brother and I would have had at least 27 siblings…) Fear and a good upbringing.

My plan would be?

Educate teens about making them feel good about who they are and to feel good about the choices they make. And make damn sure they are equipped with all the information about what’s out there when they do make choices that can affect the rest of their lives.

Build and develop a relationship of trust where a teen can come to an adult and ask the questions they need to ask without fear.

Of course, can this be done in a classroom? Or does it need to start from day one?

Truthfully, it’s not hard to be a virgin. The hard part comes with making the choices that keep you true to yourself, whatever that choice may be.