R.I.N.O. Sightings:  A long, long time ago…(I decided be a RINO host)

In a moment of quirky cleverness, (the success thereof, yet to be decided) I rounded up the Raging RINO participants to the melody of a little tune. I hope you enjoy. And double secret underground thanks to Instapundit for the link!

*Sing along to the tune of American Pie by Don McLean*

A long, long time ago…
I can still remember
How Hillary used to represent the left.
And I knew if I had my chance
Jane Fonda could make those people dance
And, maybe, they’d be happy, for a while.

But this pathetic excuse for a mother made me shiver
With every arrest warrant I’d deliver.
Bad news from the private development front…
I couldn’t take one more *finger* (grunt)

I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about citizens becoming spies,
Security guards keep frisking casserole pies.
Today the R.I.N.O.’s thrive.

So bye-bye, miss Baghdadarella
Drove my chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
The hot RINOS were drinkin whiskey and rye
Singin,”today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

Did you write the book of love,
And do you have faith in the U.N. above?
If Cat Stevens tells you so?
Do you believe in rock n roll,
Can CCTV save our mortal souls?
And can you teach me how to ring my bell real slow?

Well, I know that you’re in love with liberty
`cause I saw you discussing regulation and practicality
You both kicked off your sandals and socks
Man, those Canadian tunes really do rock!

I was a lonely teenage Yemeni Kid
Stuck in prison and fighting the system.
But I knew I could be in luck
The day the RINO’s sign my petition.

I started singin,
“bye-bye, pseudoephedrine”
Gotta get it behind the counter
If you want your nose dry.
The hot RINOS were drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

This man’s family is excessively overblown
I wonder if they could prequalify for a loan,
But that’s not how it used to be.
Santorum showed up on the Daily Show, Jon, the host talked real slow.
What makes a family? What do we know…

And while we all watch *over there*
A fatwa compare/contrast essay question was written with care.
The classroom was adjourned;
No verdict was returned.
And while Donovan discussed the nuking of Mecca,
The Iraqi constitution, was excluding Israelis.
And people talked about Reagan in the airports
Today the R.I.N.O.’s thrive.

We were singing,
“Bye-bye Miss American Pi.”
Drove my chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
And the hottest media RINO was drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

Helter skelter in the summer swelter.
Jimmy Carter’s hiding in his fallout shelter,
Chinese Yen is high and dollar falling fast.
NASA’s grounded on the grass.
Owners of android-women try for a forward pass
With the Judge Posner on the sideline, talking fast.

Now the 2008 GOP straw poll is complete
While breast not bombs protesters are in the street
Condi supporters got up to dance,
Oh, but will she get a chance?
Pataki tries to take the field;
The Islamic Jihadists refused to yield.
I *heart* Tony Blair* was revealed.
Today the R.I.N.O.’s thrive.

We started singing,
Bye-bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
And the hottest media RINO was drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

Oh, and there we were in more than one place,
A labor union lost in space
With no android to mediate.
So come on House be nimble, Senate be quick!
Jack and his violent video games blew up a candlestick
Cause cocaine is the devil’s only friend.

Oh, and as I watched this pianist on the stage
My hands were clenched in fists of rage.
No hacker found in hell
Could break this barexam spell.
And as the space shuttle climbed high into the night
Only $200,000 for a flight…,
I saw the pajama media laughing with delight
Today the R.I.N.O.’s thrive.

He was singing
Bye-bye Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
And the hottest media RINO was drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

I met a Governor who sang the blues
And I asked him for some Presidential news,
But he just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the ESPN channel
Where I’d heard the producers have gone mental,
But the man there said the foodies really pay.

And in the streets: the P.E.T.A members screamed
The fishies swam, and cows fed on the green.
But not a word was spoken;
The sport of politics was broken.
And the three (wo)men I admire most:
Jessica Simpson, Posner, and Kat who is raising money by blogging for the cancer society ,
They caught the last train for the coast
Today the R.I.N.O.’s thrive.

And they were singing
“Bye-bye Miss American Pi.”
Drove my chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
And the hottest media RINO was drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

“Bye-bye Miss American Pi.”
Drove my chevy to the levee,
But the levee was dry.
And the hottest media RINO was drinkin whiskey and rye
And singin, “today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”
“Today’s the day the R.I.N.O.’s will thrive.”

Goodnight New York!