Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Makers of Hefty Zoo Pals.

Actually not only the Zoo Pal plates but also colorful and fun children’s utensils. They looked fun, so of course I had to take out the plastic pieces to browse over the different animal options.

While looking through the knifes, I found that one of them, a brown one, was particularly wide. Not exactly a knife, but looked more like, like…as Karen said a cheese spreader. Um, ok. Cause children need cheese spreaders too? On the box it actually says 4 knives, 4 spoons, 4 forks and 4 spreaders. Alrighty.

Moving on…we are eating ice cream cake with Mark’s co-workers. One of his bosses, Ellen, stops by to visit, but she cannot have the sweets for she gave them up for lent. Ellen is offered a Zoo Pal plate as a consolation prize as well as the option of a Dinosaur Fork, a Piggy Spoon or (I am saying this out loud and LOUDLY as I pull the brown piece of plastic out of the box, by the 3rd syllable, I notice my fatal error but tis too late to stop…) or this…BEAVER SPREADER.

EVERYONE breaks into hysterical laughter. Innocent as I seem, I am absolutely bright red with embarrassment and the words, “BEAVER SPR….e…a…d…e…r” hang in the air between cyclical fits of continuing giggles.

I won’t be living this one down any time soon. As someone pointed out, Hefty could be breaking into the bachelor party market soon. I mean first penis straws for women and now beaver spreaders…

You just know some creative with a master’s degree in a fine art is stuck working for the Hefty Children Product Division and did this intentionally.

So if Hefty is wondering why they are selling out of Zoo Pal plastic children’s utensils in the WNY area? Yeah, I might have shared this story with a few people already, all with the same reaction, and all of them who wanted to get their hands on one of the coveted beaver spreaders of their very own.