Today, I actually started to wonder if I will be around people again in 2020. And it only seems to look like more of the same. I’m high risk. I’m not leaving Weber Wonderland…I can’t even imagine when I might feel safe again. Scary thoughts.
I walked by the creek and picked flowers this morning, came back up the wee hill to the porch and was BREATHLESS. It’s insane. And my antibody test said negative for Covid-19. I’m so terrified of what it will do to me because WTF did I have for two+ months if not Covid-19? Sigh. It feels lingering, lifetime lingering never-ending. SO DIFFERENT FROM THE FLU which comes and stays and makes one miserable for a short amount of time and then goes the fuck away.
The sickest I’ve been was back in 2009 when I had Swine Flu (and pneumonia).
Day 6. IM GOING ON DAY 6 OF THE FLU WITH LOW GRADE FEVERS AND NO HUMAN CONTACT! Even worse? I spent this morning trying to throw up a mere glass of juice I had hours before. SO MUCH FUN!
Hahahahaha. 6 WHOLE DAYS! In fairness, I was single and living alone at the time. So despite the fact I’m currently on day 70 of isolation now, I have HWMMS. Also I hate hate hate throwing up the most.
AAAARUGH! I’VE HAD ENOUGH! I WANT TO CRY. (But when I cry, I can’t breathe…) I’VE BEEN SICK IN MY APARTMENT NOW FOR 9 DAYS. 9 DAYS!!! And right when I think something is going my way, for example…oh I haven’t had a fever in the last 3 days…I END UP THROWING UP INSTEAD.
I do NOT RECOMMEND getting the Swine Flu and having a fever for a week and then finding out that the flu has turned into pneumonia and the antibiotic you are supposed to take makes you nauseous and the drippy phlegm that runs down your throat into a big hunk in your chest takes away your will to live not to mention appetite.
THAT SAID. I’m down about 10 pounds (no joke.) AND FINALLY FEELING A LITTLE BIT BETTER. What a fun two weeks this has been, really. No seriously, this has been the sickest I’ve been, perhaps ever. This swine flu is no joke
Yeah a WHOLE different illness. This sick I’ve had in 2020? I had a high fever for a few days and low-grade for at least two weeks which would come back here and there. I feel like I can’t breathe and I’m utterly exhausted. I want to do all the things, but my body wants to sleep. My body hates me and punishes me the following day if I do too much the day before. And by too much, I mean, a few hours of moving around.
I feel like I’m going to be home, forever. Today is really the first day that this has “bothered” me, the idea of being home. I don’t need to go anywhere. And 99% of the time I’m more than content to be at Weber Wonderland. But apparently Day #70 I’ve reached that 1%.
At least I’m less irritable today?
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