I’ve used the phrase “emotional sponge” a few times this weekend in describing myself.
Oh how true it is. I mean in the long run, I wouldn’t want me any other way. But right now. This very moment? I’m spent. Drenched in thoughts and hopes and prayers. Feeling far too much reciprocal pain and sympathy in the present and at the same time, selfishly finding myself reliving and coping with far, far too many unhealed wounds and emotions of the past.
It happens every time…
I anxiously sop every last drop of emotion from others in their time of need. Must. Do. Something. Empathy overload (now with more absorbency!) I feel the pain of others. I cry their tears. I hope their hopes. I hug, I support, I try my best to be a good friend and be there for whatever might be needed. Not a drop left to clean up after, that’s my goal. (Sometimes I wonder if it’s almost my purpose, to serve others in times of need.) I combine all the goo, all the guck, all the flowing emotions and thinking too much and add it along side what’s still left over inside. And when the time is right, and no one’s looking…I wring out the sponge and release, always careful to hold just enough inside to get through the next spilly, messy moment. Lather, rinse, repeat.
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